How To Stop Playing The Name Game
By Meredith O'Connor
As Suzanne was ending a call with a prospective client, who’s first name was Elizabeth, she said, “Thanks Kelly! Talk to you in a few weeks.”
As she hung up the phone, she winced. And so did I! I knew she’d be kicking herself! What a gaffe!
How can you make that mistake?! As it turns out, this prospective client’s last name was Keller.
Kelly. Keller. Kelly. Keller. Easy to see how that happened.
When you use someone’s name in conversation, it makes them feel appreciated and comfortable with you. We all love to hear the sound of our own name. But using the wrong name can have the opposite of the intended effect.
How do you avoid such a blunder? And how can you become better at remembering names in every business situation?
Let’s face it - everyone gets stuck in a whirlwind once in a while. You’re on the go, with six meetings in one afternoon, breakfast and evening events, burning the candle on both ends. You can barely remember your own name, never mind every name of the 45 people you speak to in one day!
Here’s a great technique for phone conversations – so you don’t have to remember who’s on the other end of the line.
When you’re talking to someone you don’t know very well, make sure to keep their name in front of you. It can be a business card, their database record, a simple piece of paper. Just keep their name in front of you – it will remind you to use it in the context of the conversation and it will be there in case you have a “memory lapse.”
Sometimes the problem isn’t matching a face to a name, but a name to a face. Say you’re in your office – it’s the calm after the storm. You’ve finally gotten through all the events, meetings, etc...when your phone rings. It’s Frank who says you met at “insert event name here” on Tuesday night.
Frank, Frank, Frank – you frantically try and recall meeting a Frank on Tuesday. But you had conversations with 10 or 15 people! What to do?
Now, if you’re already at this point – there’s nothing to do but ‘fess up and ask him to clarify who he is. But there’s a great technique to prepare for this type of situation – something you could have done on Tuesday night.
Say that within the context of your conversation, Frank mentioned his love for sailing. Make note of this – on the back of Frank’s business card. When you get back to your office, keep this information handy – put it in your database. When Frank calls, you access his contact information, see the reference to sailing and immediately visualize the conversation you had with Frank. The phone call starts out much more smoothly.
Remember some of these other tips for remembering names and using names appropriately in conversation:
• Mentally note the name when it is spoken.
• Repeat the name while saying, “Glad to meet you Mr. ________.”
• Use the name in conversation a few times.
• Ask to repeat the name if you miss it.
By the way, how do you handle it when you blow it? Apologize and poke fun at yourself.
Suzanne immediately sent a note, and Elizabeth returned with a gracious response. In fact, she became a client. All’s well that ends well.